Good Habits II (Enforcement)

…it rests with parents and teachers to lay down lines of habit on which the life of the child may run henceforth with little jolting or miscarriage, and may advance in the right direction with the minimum of effort.  

The morning after our revelation and resolve, Adam and I called the children in and we had a matter of fact talk.  We tried to best explain that they are getting older and instead of becoming more responsible, they seem headed in the opposite direction. Since we love them as deeply as we do, we are determined to help them.  We decided that they would have to follow a list of written instructions from the moment they awoke.  Their toys would have to be reduced.  They could choose upto three items for play (board games excluded). The rest would be put away until they proved faithful with the few.  Yes, tears did ensue but we stood firm.  We did stretch the three items of choice to four!

Making their bed was number one on the list.  (BTW it has actually been proven that people who make their bed everyday are more efficient).   A bed badly made would be considered a bed not made!  What needs to be put away would need to be placed exactly where it belongs and not in the neighboring vicinity! We realize that we will have to mentally prepare for inevitable failure as these habits form and also be diligently to check whether everything required is done and how .

The mother will be tempted to relax her efforts – to overlook a little dawdling because the dear child has been trying so hard.  This is absolutely fatal…To form a habit is the work of a few weeks; to guard it is a work of incessant, but by no means anxious care.

It is possible we are bordering on militant but we are planning to face it with cheer and bring to their attention how pleased they can be with themselves.  How rewarding to look for something and find it exactly where it is expected to be! We are still in the cocoon stage but hopefully the expected metamorphosis will take place and yes, I am referring to Nature’s most magical change and not Kafka’s brilliantly written but rather depressing fiction!

Whether you choose or no to take any trouble about the formation of his habits, it is habit, all the same, which will govern ninety-nine one hundredths of a child’s life…What we can do for them is to secure that they have habits which shall lead them in ways of order, propriety, and virtue, instead of leaving their wheel of life to make ugly ruts in miry places.

*(All italicized words  in this post are quotes from  Charlotte Mason’s  Home Education Series, Part III, Habit Is Ten Natures)